When Friends...

Mood: Depressed

Aren't really the friends you thought they were.

What have I done to deserve all this shit? And all along I thought I could manage my time with my different groups of friends properly. Who the fuck knew I would screw up?

The all of you are worried that I will change. In what way, I should ask?

You all are making assumptions that I am ignoring you because my college friends are fun and I spend more time with them? Is that why the both of you don't call me out to SMC on Friday nights anymore? Is that why? If it's not then I want to know why.

I don't need to be a genius to figure out that not smsing you for one month equals to a bucketful of misunderstandings and wrong assumptions. I know you too well Leow Zheng Kai.

If you and Mc were any other friend, I wouldn't give a shit. But the both of you aren't just "any other friend".

Oh, and Mc, so much for your friend huh. I'm sorry for not, er, being there when I am supposed to be? I don't know. I don't know what the fuck is going on because you all are keeping all this shit from me. It's not as if you don't know that you can just confront me if you are unhappy with anything. Is it so difficult?

I have not been ignoring the both of you. Heck, the both of you have never even looked for me. Just 'cause you read my posts about me going out with friends other than you all, you respond by not inviting me out on Friday nights? Is that how you all handle things?

Just so you know, I would turn down any invitation from other friends just to hang out with the both of you. That's how much the both of you mean to me.

Words can not describe the hurt I feel inside. I have never shed tears for a mere friend before. I'm sorry for sounding pathetic. Don't get me wrong, I'm not begging the both of you to forgive me. For I have done no wrong.

I can't believe you're saying my new friends are more fun to be with because they have cars. I'm so fucking disappointed. Can't believe you don't know me well enough.

We can leave our situation as it is now. All that would be left of our relationship would just be faded memories. It is not simple for me but if that's how you all want things to be, so be it. Losing one friend is nothing to you.

Oh, and good luck for your midterm next week.