I don't want to love him anymore , but I know it is gonna take a long time for me to get over it . I just don't know how . Everytime I think about the things he has done to me , anger builds up in me . Yet , when I think about what we had then , my heart aches . I miss him . It just breaks my heart every time someone mentions his name or I see him somewhere whether it be he's talking to me or otherwise . I don't want to have anything to do with him , I don't want him to sms me , I don't want him to talk to me , I don't want him to chat with me . Yet , I want it as much as I don't !
Him sms-ing me or talking to me gives me a sense of reassurance . I feel much more better when he talks to me . When he doesn't sms me , I feel really down and upset . To all my friends , I know you guys are getting kinda fed-up with how I'm reacting towards this situation but I hope you guys understand that I need some time . I will get over him eventually , just not now . My fever is not as bad as last night , so I'm kinda fine although I still have it . Don't worry aight , I know how to take care of myself . I hope .